I'm not buying what you're selling

Field notes on Self Love

I used to have a friend who’d say to me, ‘You’re spiraling out again’ whenever I’d get on a roll about any given topic. In those moments, I’d feel shamed and quickly shut down whatever I was speaking about. 

Now that I’ve had some distance from this person for a few months, I realize there was nothing wrong with ‘spiraling out’. It was just me being passionate and feeling all of my intense emotions, wanting to express them to someone whom I thought was an ally, someone I thought I was safe to be ‘all of me’ with. It took lots of quiet time and deep reflection to get here.

I feel deeply about many things. I know I can be a lot and not everyone can go into the depths with me. It takes a person who’s worked deeply on their own ’stuff’, someone who can stay grounded when I expand. It’s been hard to find a close friend who can do this until very recently. 

Through lonely times, I’ve learned the most important thing I can do is value myself, rather than dim and hide parts of me in order to fit in.

Trusting ourselves and our own unique genius is the greatest path to authenticity.

And authenticity, I’ve recently learned, is the strongest frequency to emanate from our bodies and energy fields. Authenticity must be cultivated in order to vibrate from pure love.

This makes total sense to me, because an authentic person loves themselves deeply. An authentic person isn’t afraid to shine their light. 

An authentic person is in coherence with their own Soul.

The road to authenticity can be full of potholes. I believe, when we fall into them, we should spend time there sitting alone in the dark. 

Give yourself time to sort out all the ways that life and others may try to keep you from honoring the wholeness of who you are. Consider that their reactions to you may come from unhealed places within them. Try not to take it personally.

Develop the strength and courage to be your whole self anyway. 

I’ve learned that the greatest love story I will live in a human body is the one I have with myself. I wish that for you, too.

Photo note: The sculpture, which I saw recently in a museum, is a remnant taken from the Missouri Pacific Building, built in 1904 but since demolished. The Lion symbolizes strength, security in oneself and majesty and was often put into the architecture of new buildings as a talisman to bring good fortune.

We’re now in the Venus Sacral chakra gate during the LEO Venus cycle. I’ve found lions everywhere I go since this cycle began in August, and indeed, I’m paying attention to the reminders to own myself fully, the main message of this Venus cycle. In the morning star phase we’re in for just a while longer, it’s specifically about letting go of anything that keeps you from doing just that.

May you be able to use this time and energy to benefit your greatest becoming. And so it is.